Friday, May 06, 2011

Motherhood Series - Kerry

Kerry and I are also cousins, on my Dad's side. We grew up in the same small town, minutes away from each other and my grandparents. So we spent a lot of time together as kids.

After we all grew up and went in different directions we didn't see each other as often. But now that we're grown and both have kids we've found that we have some similar interests again. And our girls get along like long lost pals!

It always breaks my heart a little when I think of my aunt who passed away at such a young age. It's such a terrible loss.

Kerry's girls are bright and lively and completely individual. Kerry is compassionate, tender-hearted, and a fun and creative (and brave) mom!

1.Tell us about yourself!

I am a stay at home mom of two little girls 5 and 3. And will soon be embarking on a crazy but thrilling adventure of homeschooling .(That in itself is a story of its own)

2. What were your expectations of motherhood before you had kids?

For me I always knew I wanted to have two kids. Three was an awkward number because one always got left out and four was just way too many for my liking.

But to be hones, even though I wanted them, I was terrified to have them. I was afraid of the power I would have over them. In my family there were lots of “anger issues” and I was afraid that I would not be able to control my temper or my words.

Another expectation that I still have difficulties coming to terms with is I expected that my mom would be always be around to talk to, to get support from, and have her there just do general “grandma-y” things. I was in no way prepared for her loss when she died of Cancer. When we buried her 3 weeks before the arrival of my second child I was not sure how I would cope with out her. It gets easier but I still miss her terribly.

3.What has been(was) your biggest surprise about Motherhood?

One thing I always said to myself was that I was not going to have any expectations of who my children would be. I would not put pressure on them to be someone they were not. It wasn't long after my second daughter was born that I discovered I really did have expectations. I wanted them to be like me. I wanted them to like what I liked. I have quite often had to take a step back and fight the urge to be disappointed and just be grateful for the little people they are.

4.Biggest joy?

I don't think I could limit my “ biggest” joy to just one thing. Its a million tiny things. Like the first time they recognize you,the first time they smile,the first time they say “momma”.Its when they learn something new and they have that sparkle in there eyes because they truly get it. Its when they curl up in your lap when you read them a story book for the 100th time or when they fall asleep in you arms. Its when they put their arms around your neck and squeeze so tight while they whisper “I love you” in your ear or put their tiny hand in yours. These are the moments that make it truly worth it.

5.Best wish for your children?

My greatest wish for my girls is that they will know JOY in their lives. Not a life devoid of hardships, but one in which they know they are truly love and they are worth it. I wish for them to be able to stand strong and have courage when the trials come, yet be humble enough to be thankful for all they have been given.

6.How do you find time for yourself/What do you do.?

Time for myself is a bit of a luxury due to the nature of my husband's job. But when I do get a chance, more often than not you will find me playing with my pictures/camera, reading blogs or curled up in a chair with a good home decorating magazine.

7.What do you wish you had more of? Less of?

More patience and less of a perfectionist attitude!

8.What do I hope your kids learn from you?

“Do as I say not as I do.” LOL! What I mean is that I hope they can learn from my mistakes.

9.What are some of the best things you learned from your own mother?

My mom was a kind and generous woman who was slow to anger and never said an unkind word about anyone. She was always there when someone needed help and she was content just to step back and let others shine. She was selfless and giving and more often than not she went with out so her children could have.

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